1. Certain foods have to be avoided from the recipes. No pork is a big one to keep in mind. Apparently, whether we realized it or not, felines are either Orthodox Jewish or Muslim. Who knew?
2. There will be no mixing of dog food ingredients. I apparently require more protein than most canines which translates into more money which translates into no filet mignon for me.
3. My human pet informed me that, "This was not Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous."
4. Overdoses of Vitamin A can be toxic, and well, if you know my human pet in even the slightest, then you know how terms such as "can be toxic" affect her, i.e., paranoid and anxiety-ridden to the point of paralysis.
5. Many cat food recipes can be found on the Internet. We all know how truthful the Internet can be.
6. Apparently, most of these recipes contain vegetables. I don't know about you, but the thought of consuming broccoli, cauliflower, or even brussel sprouts didn't sound appealing before so even with the scare of recalled food, it still doesn't sound appealing. I'd consider it if there were cheese sauce to be had.
7. Unfortunately, because I have been unable to kill several mosquito hawks and one frog that came into The House, there will be no custom cat food.
8. Use of garlic salt seems high on the list of spices for homemade pet food. I have no interest in garlic or salt. Whatever happened to plain old meat, raw and dripping?
9. When I persisted she make me my own food, she exclaimed, "You'll eat what I put in front of you, and you'll like it."
10. There was also the infamous line of, "If you don't want to eat it, you can starve for all I care."
11. I personally enjoyed the argument that since I was named for a god, I should summon my own food. Note to human pet: Just because I have the name does not mean I have the power.
12. My human pet also pointed out that she would not "pimp my bowl."
13. "I don't have time for that." This is her go-to answer when I question her. I'll remember that the next time she wants me to make time for her.