Kitty Hazing

Blackie here! Zeus has been showing me around the house. He showed me where the food and water was...

...where the litter box was...

...where I could sleep (He told me Isis wouldn't mind!)...

...and then he showed me this room with a huge white curtain. He told me this is where terrific shows take place. I was very excited since I hadn't known my new home had a built-in theatre!

But then the lady peeked from behind the curtain and SCREAMED! Zeus had taken me to the shower, not a theatre! Oh, how embarassing.

I'm gonna get you back, Zeus! Just you wait!

The Amazing Zeus: Learning About the Confederacy With Boni, Sanjee, and Mini!

When Phil showed up on the doorstep this morning, I almost thought I needed my eardrops when he told me I was headed for Virginia for a third time!

"Are you serious? I'm getting to go to Virginia again?!" I said excitedly.

Phil nodded. "You have a lot of fans there apparently. You have to give the people what they want."

Phil was always so wise in what he said. I knew he was right. I was off to visit with Boni, Sanjee, Mini, and the rest of the fabulous felines in the House of (Mostly) Black Cats! And seeing as though this would be my third trip, I was keenly aware of an old homo sapien saying that said the "third time was the charm". Deep inside, I hoped that it would turn out to be true!

Once again as I rode in the backseat of the taxi, I was reminded how Virginia was simply marvelous. I could look at the land for days! The birds chirped pleasantly, the wind gave a gentle nudge, and the trees even seemed to bend to welcome me. It simply is the most serene place I think I have ever visited.





Arriving at The House of MBC, I climbed out of the backseat and made my way to the front door. I knocked politely, but while I was waiting for an answer, I saw two very pretty kitties staring at me curiously. I stared at them and said hello, but they did not say anything back to me. My attention was diverted, though, when two very nice human lady pets opened the door.

"Well aren't you precious?" said the younger one.

"He is simply too cute! We have to get the other kitties so they can say hello." The older lady turned her head and called out: "Boni! Sanjee! Mini! Come say hello to Zeus!"

The two human lady pets opened the door and let me inside their home. I rubbed against their legs to let them know I was very appreciative of being there. I stood in the entrance, but it didn't take long for me to be bombarded by the three (mostly) black cats!

"Zeus! You made it!" cheered Boni.

"We're glad you came to visit us!" smiled Sanjee.

"We were worried that our postcard had been lost! Did the X on the map help you find us?" asked Mini.

I chuckled. "Well, I had been to Virginia before, you know. I sort of had an idea of where to find you!" I remembered the two cats from outside suddenly so I asked, "Who by chance were the two cats outside?"

"Oh! That's Pepi and Gree, our outside brother and sister," said Boni. "They probably didn't know you were coming since we're the only ones who really use the computer."

As we were all sitting there talking and catching up, the doorbell rang.

"You know, I am always surprised by how prompt that Phil guy is," said Sanjee. "He never wastes time!"

We all chuckled as the human lady pets opened the door, and sure enough, there was Phil.

"Boni, Sanjee, Mini, and Zeus. You have $200.00 for this leg of the race. Here is your first clue. Read it carefully, and be safe on your travels."

We opened up the clue and read it together:

Make your way to The Arm of Stonewall Jackson. Once there, search the grounds for your next clue.

"The arm? What does that mean?" I asked.

The three (mostly) black cats laughed. "It's this person's arm. We don't know why, but it's just his arm," said Boni.

"Are you kidding?! Just this guy's arm? In plain sight for everyone to look at? That is completely gross!" I said disgusted.

"No, no, no! It's underneath the ground so you can't see it, but there's a big stone to tell you it's there," explained Sanjee.

I scrunched up my face as I wasn't too sure about this adventure. Seeing someone's arm with no body attached to it seemed a bit morbid, not to mention gross and highly unusual. Even though Boni, Sanjee, and Mini assured me that I wouldn't actually see it, I couldn't stop wondering what was it with these silly homo sapiens and their bizarre antics? Doesn't anyone ever tell these people that burying someone's arm might not be the best thing in the world?


We made our way outside, and the younger of the two human lady pets said that she would drive us to the site. When we arrived, the four of us stepped out of the car and began walking towards the marker. The landscape was really pretty, but underneath the ground was a horrible revelation. Apparently, there were many soldiers buried under the field, and because of 19th century tradition in Virginia, none of them had a marker. 'But the arm has a marker,' I found myself thinking. 'This is creepy.'

Boni spotted the clue not too far off from the gravesite. We opened it together and read:

Make your way to the Museum of the Confederacy. Once there, search for your next clue.

"Do you think this is where we might find out more about who this arm belonged to? I feel kind of bad not knowing its owner," I said.

Boni, Sanjee, and Mini nodded. "Maybe we can ask our Mom to explain some of it to us on the way," said Sanjee.

We made our way back to the car, and once inside, Boni asked the human lady pet who Stonewall Jackson was. "Mom, do you know who Stonewall Jackson is?" asked Boni.

"I sure do! He earned his famous name at The Battle of First Manassas during the Civil War because he kept the Union at bay. A nearby general saw him standing along the hill, and said, 'There stands Jackson like a stone wall,' and that's how he got his name!"

"What's the Civil War?" asked Sanjee.

"That was from 1861-1865 when our country was divided into two parts: The Union and The Confederacy. You're going to get to visit the Museum of the Southern half of the country during that time," explained the highly intelligent human lady pet.

The Museum was absolutely fascinating. We got to look at the soldiers' uniforms, the types of guns they used in the past, and gaze at beautiful artwork that depicted very famous homo sapiens such as Robert E. Lee, Jefferson Davis, and even the Stonewall Jackson person (but he had his arm this time!). There was furniture from that time and many different types of flags used by the Confederate army. They even had sculptures and stuff used around the house!

As we toured the museum, we found our next clue sitting by this Confederate soldier's uniform. We read it together:

Make your way to the White House of the Confederacy.

"I thought there was only one White House in the United States?" I said.

"I thought that too," said Mini.

"Why is this one different? I also thought the real White House was located in Washington D.C., or at least, the human pet's future mate said so," I said.

"I'm sure our Mom will know what the deal is," said Boni.

We went back to the car to ask the (mostly) black cats' human lady pet what the deal was with this second White House:

"Well, kitties, you see, back in that time, the United States was really a country divided into two parts, and because it was, each side had its own White House. However, the one which is in Washington D.C. is the one we all recognize now as the country's White House," the (mostly) black cat's human lady pet explained.

Confused slightly, but intrigued, we walked back towards the museum and found the White House of the Confederacy right by it. When we walked inside, we were amazed at how large and expansive the house, er, mansion was! It had a lot of its original contents (or so we were told) which included fancy artwork, expensive architecture, and very different pieces of furniture. It was all so lavish that we didn't feel right even stretching our claws or leaping onto the couches for an afternoon nap.

When we had seen enough, Mini mentioned that she had seen a gift shop back in the Museum. We walked back to see if there was anything to purchase, and Sanjee found this cool shirt for her human lady pet as a thank-you for taking us all over Richmond:

"If only it had (mostly) black cats on it," said Boni.

"Really! All it has, though, are Zeuses!" said Sanjee.

"Oh well! Mom will remember Zeus' trip, though, for sure now!" said Mini.

We walked back to the (mostly) black cats' car where their human lady pet was waiting for us. She laughed when she saw the t-shirt Mini had purchased for her and nuzzled them all closely.

"Well, thank you for the t-shirt, but I hate to say it is time for Zeus to go back home to Houston, Texas," she said.

"Awwww," the three (mostly) black cats said in unison.

I smiled politely at the three of them and said, "I really had an interesting and fun time with the three of you! I learned a whole lot about American history, and I can't wait to tell the human pet's future mate all about it. He's a history buff, you know!"

Thank you very much Boni, Sanjee, and Mini (and Pepi and Gree!) for inviting me to your house. I had a very special time with you! Thank you also to your human lady pets for allowing me into your home and taking us around to all the sights! I will remember it always.

Blackie is finally here!!!

The human pet went to the post office today because she had figured out that Blackie was being held prisoner. The post office was holding him hostage and going to demand some serious cash for his release. They demanded ten squillion dollars, and the human pet didn't know how she would come up with so much cash so quickly...

Well, it didn't really happen like that, but I prefer that fantastical explanation since it seems more believable than what really happened.

Anyway, onto Blackie's homecoming!

Isis checks out the box. "Umm, Zeus...I think we have company."

"Yep, I was right! Did you find out if he's got all of his shots? He can't be here otherwise!"

"Blackie, I hate to get personal so quickly, but you did get all of your shots, right? Give me something I can tell Isis so she shuts up."

"Tell Isis I'm a special breed called Ceramic Tabby. Ceramic Tabbies are...hmm...infamous for their natural immunity to all forms of feline diseases and infections. Yes, that's it!"

"Good thinking!"

"Ceramic Tabby, eh? Natural immunity? I gotta sniff this to believe it."

Blackie breathes a sigh of relief. "Thank goodness she believed it! I really want to stay here! I don't want to go back to the post office!"

"Bah! She doesn't have any power here anyhow. C'mon! Let's play some with the mousie! I've been waiting a long time to play with you."

A big special thanks to Derby for sending me my new friend! I will treasure him forever, and sooner or later, so will Isis!

X marks the spot on Virginia once more!

Hello again, everyone!

I'm in disbelief. Yes, it's true. After you read this next postcard, you will understand why as well:




Front:
X <--- The Spot!

Back:
Dear Zeus,

We sent Mom to 5 places to find a postcard and this was the best she could do! Silly Mom! We'll go to the arm place wif you if you want. We can't wait til you can visit!

Luv, Sanjee, Boni, and Mini

And would you believe they live in Virginia too?! This will make the third trip to Virginia! I am truly blessed, and I hope it is true that the third time is the charm. I can't wait to see you House of (Mostly) Black Cats!

The Amazing Zeus: Discovering who Pike is and flying metal birds with Meeko and Kiara!

Phil came to the house bright and early to escort me to the airport for my next adventure. However, I was not quick enough to answer the door, and my human pet answered instead.

"Hello,...Phil," she said.

"Hello, Marina!" Phil replied.

"Coming to take my cat again?"

"Well, yes. The show isn't over yet, and there's still a lot more for Zeus to see and do," responded Phil.

The human pet nodded slowly, and then looked down to notice I was sitting at her feet. "Fine, fine, get out of here then. Hurry home though. Isis is getting a bit comfortable not having you here."

As Phil was taking me out of The House, I saw Isis wave methodically from the den's window. She had an evil smile on her face as she held up a can of delicious sardines.

'I'll get you, Isis. So help me, I'll get you...' I thought to myself as I sneered back at her.

My flight to Colorado Springs was very pleasant. This was my first trip across the Rocky Mountains, and as I was flying in, I could see them from my window seat. They towered across the skies, and the clouds would wisp around their tops. It was just incredible to see so much grandeur, and I could hardly believe this was all found right here in America. It was almost like traveling to another country!

The production crew had secured me a taxi upon arrival, and I rode out to meet with Meeko and Kiara of The Lone Star Purrs. I was wondering what all we would do in Colorado Springs, and I speculated about all of the things they had mentioned on their postcard. Would there be mountains in our journey? Airplanes? Gardens?

We approached the house, and when the taxi stopped, I hopped out of the backseat and walked up to the front door. I knocked and waited, but not for long as a very nice human lady pet opened the door.

"You're finally here! Oh the girls are going to be so excited!" She turned her head to the back of the house and yelled, "Meeko! Kiara! Zeus is here!"

The human lady pet let me into the house where I was met by Meeko, a diluted calico with the longest hair, and her sister, Kiara, a tortoiseshell feline with equally long hair. I almost thought I was looking at Isis' long-haired twin sister when I saw Meeko that I did a double-take!

"We have been waiting forever for you to come, Zeus!" screamed Meeko.

"Well, not forever. I counted 5,903 naps worth of waiting to be honest," said Kiara.

"Wow. That's a long time to be waiting if it was 5,903 naps worth," I said. I immediately felt bad that it had taken me so long to get there, but the girls assured me it was alright.

"We know that you had a lot of other places to see, but we're really happy you're here now!" said Meeko.

"You know, we used to live in Texas too, Zeus," said Kiara. "We didn't live in Houston, but in a city called Fort Worth. Do you know where that is?"

I shook my head, and Kiara sighed. "Aww, well you're missing out! It's a rather nice place I have to say. Guess there's no point, though, in asking you how things are going there."

Right then, the familiar knocking occurred, and the two girls cheered. "It's Phil! It's Phil!" they cried. And they were right! The human lady pet opened the door, and there stood Phil in all of his Amazing Race glory!

"Meeko, Kiara, and Zeus. You have $200.00 for this leg of the race. Here is your first clue. Make sure to read it carefully, and be safe on your travels."

We opened the clue and read it together:

Make your way to the Garden of the Gods. Once there, hike along the Siamese Twins Trail to find your next clue.

"I don't know about this," said Kiara. "These paws weren't made for walking!"

"Oh suck it up, Kiara! This is gonna be fun!" said Meeko.

As we were getting ready to leave, Meeko and Kiara's human lady pet smiled and said, "I hope you enjoy rugged terrain, Zeus. I felt it was only right that you get to experience that from the passenger seat of an SUV."

An SUV? Is that like a BMW? A SAAB? What was it with homo sapiens and these silly acronyms for their four-wheeled toys?

When we walked outside, though, we saw what she was talking about. She had rented for us a really shiny, orange Hummer. The wheels on it were at least three times my height! It looked a lot like the big, long one The Meezers' human lady pet had gotten for Miles, Sammy, Trixie, and myself when I visited Rochester, but it was much shorter.

We hopped inside and began our drive to the Garden of the Gods, and it took us about 18-20 minutes to arrive there from the Lone Star Purrs' house. Once there, the nice driver let us all out, and we took in the beautiful scenery. The mountains shimmered in shades of fiery red and crisp orange against the backdrop of big, blue sky. I had never seen anything like it before in my whole five years, and I was simply spellbound!

However, there was one peak that stood above all the rest, and my eyes kept coming back to it.

"Does that mountain have a special name?" I asked the girls.

"Oh! That's Pike's Peak!" said Meeko. "It's the tallest mountain around here."

"Who's Pike, and why is that his mountain?" I asked, but the girls laughed at me.

"To be honest, Zeus, we really don't know, but we can find out while we're here if you want!" said Kiara.

We made our way into the entrance of the park and looked for signs that would lead us to the Siamese Twins Trail. After having found the trail, we hiked an entire mile (yes, an entire mile!) while looking out across the landscape. This picture is of the Siamese Twins which is actually two similar rock formations. You can look through the two rock formations and see Pike's Peak framed in between. Meeko, Kiara, and I all agreed that the view was simply spectacular!

Strangely enough, when we got closer to the twin rocks, we saw a clue laying on the ground. Kiara picked it up, and we all read it together:

Make your way back to the Garden of the Gods' Visitor Center. Discover why the Peak is Pike's Peak. If you correctly identify the person responsible for the mountain's name, you will receive your next clue.

"Since when does Phil do trivia?!" stomped Meeko. "On none of the other travels did he have questions!"

"Maybe he thought we were smart cats?" commented Kiara.

"Well," I said bashfully, "I did kinda want to know why the mountain was named that."

We made our way back down the trail to the visitors' center. Once inside, we toured around the center, looking inside all of the gift shops and attempting to speak to all of the homo sapiens we could, but no one would listen to us. Sure, we got a lot of points, snickers, and stares, but that was about all of the information we received.

Finally, we entered into an American Indian jewelry store where we found a very nice lady who had three pictures on the front of her counter. She also had the Amazing Zeus flag so we knew we had located the right place! She peered down at us with a chagrin and just began talking as if on cue:

"In 1803, Pike's Peak was obtained in the Louisana Purchase. In 1806, President Jefferson sent Zebulon Montgomery Pike to figure out the borders of the Louisana Purchase, and as a result, Pike decided to try climbing the peak of the mountain. He never did get to accomplish this, though, due to a blizzard in November of that year. However, the mountain earned his surname nonetheless. This is documented according to military maps dating from 1835."

I whispered to Kiara and Meeko, "It just goes to show you that you don't necessarily need to succeed when you attempt things. You just need to try." They both nodded. Our attention, however, was drawn to the three pictures.

"Which of these is Zebulon Montgomery Pike?"

We stared and stared at the pictures. They looked a lot alike, but the one on the right sort of stood out from the rest. He looked like he might be an adventurer, and so after some discussion, the three of us pointed at the man in the golden uniform.

"You are......CORRECT!" the human lady said.

We cheered! The nice human lady handed us our next clue which we ripped open and read immediately:

Make your way to the United States Air Force Academy.

"Oh wow! That's where our Daddy works! He goes there a lot!" said Meeko.

"We're finally going to get to see where he goes everyday!" said Kiara. "YES!"

We made our way back to the Hummer and rode for about 10 minutes. When we arrived at the Air Force Academy, I was taken aback by all of the huge metal birds. They were flying in and out of the Academy, and they zipped and zoomed through the sky. I even saw the Cadet Chapel which the Lone Star Purrs had posted pictures of on their blog!

We didn't need to walk around by ourselves for long because a very tall human gentlemen approached us. "Umm...yes, are you Meeko, Kiara, and Zeus?" he asked. He appeared a bit nervous, confused, or even embarassed, I'd say.

We nodded. "You are to come with me at once," he said in a crisp tone.

Intrigued, we followed the man through a series of buildings and then back outside again onto some runways for the metal birds. He turned to look down at us as he said, "Today, you will get the honor of flying in one of our F-16s. No feline has
ever done this before, but we heard you were coming so we wanted to give you a real treat."

"Oh my goodness! You have GOT to be joking!" screamed Meeko with excitement. Kiara nearly fainted, but I still wasn't sure what the big deal was. After all, I had flown in plenty of airplanes, and what was so special about one called an F-16?

Oh, how wrong I was! The first thing was how super F-A-S-T it went! We were literally thrown into the pilot when he took off! The clouds and sky went whizzing by so fast that I felt as if I was going to throw up. Meeko and Kiara, however, were having the time of their lives.

"Wheeeee!" screamed Kiara.

"Woohoo!" cheered Meeko.

"I'm going to puke," I choked.

When we landed, I thought I was going to have to use the litter box immediately. I was shaking all over as that had been nothing like any airplane flight I had ever taken. Meeko and Kiara thanked the pilot for taking us along on his plane, but I was too busy trying to stand upright to talk.

The girls helped me back to the Hummer, and we rode back to their house to drop them off for the evening. By the time we arrived, I was feeling much better, but I was still grateful that I would never see an F-16 again!

"Thank you for having me visit you in Colorado Springs, Meeko and Kiara. This was really fun!" I said.

"Are you sure? You looked like you were becoming green in the face on the plane," said Kiara.

"Yes, even the plane was...fun," I hesistated, but continued to say, "but I don't think I will be doing that again anytime soon!"

Thank you once again, Lone Star Purrs, for inviting me to Colorado Springs, Colorado. I really enjoyed my time with you! You are welcome to come to Houston, Texas, any time you want. I would also like to thank your human lady pet for providing us with such a pretty orange Hummer. The driver was fabulous, and he made sure to hit all of the bumps so I knew the meaning of the word "rugged" by the time I came home!

Finding out where the columbines grow!

Hello feline friends and human pets!

Today, when the human pet brought the mail back, she let out a deep sigh of wonder. She had in her hands another postcard for me, and though I could have reprimanded her for looking at someone else's mail, I let it go. She seemed particularly fascinated with this one, and I wasn't sure why until I after I read it:



Front:
United States Air Force Academy
Colorado Springs, Colorado

Back:
Zeus! :)

We hope you can make it out to colorful Colorado! ! We can show you the Academy with its HUGE metal monsters, Garden of the Gods, and Pike's Peak. The ski season is over fur now :( but maybe you could come back this winter.

Purrs,
Meeko, Kiara, and Momma Becca

Now I know why the human pet was so insanely jealous! The human pet has always wanted to visit this state to see the beautiful natural scenery and to learn more about Native American cultures. However, she'll have to plan her own trip because I'm going to Colorado tomorrow!

Looking forward to meeting you tomorrow, Lone Star Purrs,

The Amazing Zeus: Exploring The Nature of Florida with The Feline Oligarchy!

The day began like any other: The human pet was sipping her coffee and browsing the internet, Isis was watching the backyard with a keen eye, and I was laying on the back of the couch, stretched out to my fullest. However, the calm was breeched with a knock on the door, and I knew full well it was my friend, Phil.

The human pet opened the door, and she nearly took a step back when she saw it was Phil.

"I thought this Amazing Zeus campaign was over!" she said with a huff.

"Hardly. He has four more stops to go, and we're also considering having him go to one bonus city," replied Phil.

"Bonus city? What does that mean?" asked the human pet.

"We've been throwing the idea back and forth about having him visit a secret location - one which does not have any of his feline friends there, but where he can do some interesting things nonetheless. What do you think?" said Phil.

"I think this is silly is what I think! He's a c-a-t, CAT! Just who watches this show anyhow? I haven't seen it on any of the networks," stated the human pet.

"Then you must not be watching Animal Planet, BBC, BBC America, Bravo, The Discovery Channel, The Fine Living Network, or The Travel Channel," answered Phil curtly.

"Oh you're full of it, Phil! I watch nearly all of those regularly, and Zeus is never on!" said the human pet angrily with a wave of her hand. She turned to look at me on the couch, and I shuddered as I saw her eyes. "Zeus, get over here so Phil can leave!"

"Marina, why do you have to be so cold to me every time we see one another? You weren't always this way," said Phil softly.

Turning her attention back to Phil, the human pet replied, "Phil, put yourself in my shoes. Sure, I was a bit star-struck in the beginning when you would come to pick up Zeus, but now, you've been here nearly a dozen or more times! It just drains on someone to expect company at such early hours without notice. It's hardly, dare I say, 'amazing' if you ask me."

Phil picked me up from the tile floor and held me close. He lowered his voice slightly and said, "I'm sorry for annoying you, Marina. We'll be out of your way now."

Phil looked rather sad in my opinion, and I felt torn between my human pet and my friend. I didn't like being in the middle at all, but I knew I was probably going to forget about it as soon as I got onboard my flight to Gainesville, Florida. I was off to see The Feline Oligarchy!

The flight was completely smooth, and traveling to the Oligarchy's house was a breeze. Ever since the production crew learned to arrange for taxis in advance, I have never had a problem. The weather in Florida was just as delightful as it had been when I had visited the first time. Lush and green, the palm trees lined the highway, darting the verdant landscape. When I arrived at the house, I walked up the beautiful pathway and knocked on the front door.

A very nice human lady pet answered and said, "Zeus, we are so thrilled to have you here with us! The whole gang is going to be super excited to meet you finally! Come on in!" She opened the door for me, and I entered into the wonderful house. I noticed the Oligarchy's indoor playground with its holes and perches, and I was in awe. I didn't have anything like that at my house!

"Zeus, you're here! Well, this is great!" said Alberta as she approached to greet me.

"We're all so happy you could make it. We've been looking forward to this for a long time," stated Blackie as he gave me a headbutt.

"Do you have any idea what we'll be doing today, Zeus?" asked Charlie as she came up to say hello.

"I don't know yet, but I think it will be fun," I said. "It's always fun!"

"That's so true," said Sky as he too gave me a headbutt. "I think we've all had fun just reading your adventures!"

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door, and we all knew instinctively that it must be Phil! The Oligarchy's human lady pet opened the door, and sure enough, we were all right!

"Alberta, Blackie, Charlie, Sky, and Zeus. You have $200.00 for this leg of the race. Here is your first clue. Make sure to read it carefully, and be safe on your travels."

We tore open the clue and read it together:

Make your way to the Gainesville Ballet Theatre. Once there, search for your next clue.

Sky raised a curious eyebrow. "Is this serious? I mean, you can't really expect us to go to a ballet theatre and dance! We're guys," he said, but then Sky saw the look on Alberta's and Charlie's faces. Coughing suddenly, he said, "Well, almost all of us."

"Perhaps we just have to search for the clue, and there won't be any dancing involved. I heard those ballet slippers crunch your paws, and I'm not into having my toesies crunches," replied Alberta.
The Oligarchy's human lady pet was kind enough to drive us to the Theatre. When we arrived, we discovered that this theatre was unlike other theatres in that the dancers never received pay. Apparently, homo sapiens call this "nonprofit", and for the life of us, we couldn't understand why someone would come to work and not be paid for it. The homo sapiens there told us that they got paid, but not in money. (This just made the whole thing even more vastly confusing than it had been in the first place.) The entire theatre is supported by businesses in the community, and for little homo sapiens (a.k.a. children), the theatre serves as a great place for cultural development.

Alberta padded off to look for the clue among the black curtains that lined either end of the stage. Blackie decided to look for the clue at the top of the theatre, crawling along the bar that held the huge canisters of lights. Charlie hopped off to speak to the choreographer of the dancers, and Sky had a long talk with the company manager. Both of them thought maybe the homo sapiens might have seen the clue, but all of the humans gave us very confused and baffled looks. I don't think they thought felines belonged in ballet.

After a few minutes had passed, Alberta cheered loudly: "I found it! I found it! It was stuck here in the folds of the curtains!" We all ran onto the stage to read the clue together:

Make your way to the Sante Fe River Canoe Outpost. Once there, rent a canoe and travel to Ginnie Springs.

"This is really exciting! We're going to travel down the river," exclaimed Sky.

"Yes, but the river means water. If I get wet, you will never hear the end of it!" said Alberta firmly.

"Well, let's not do anything then to tip the boat so we all stay dry!" I said. I have to admit: I was a bit nervous as well about the canoe trip. Felines and water do not mix!

We made our way back to the Oligarchy's human lady pet. With a smile, she helped us all into the car, and we drove a short distance to the Outpost. At first, I had thought we would be traveling down the infamous Suwannee River, but I found out that this was the Santa Fe River. Though it had no songs about it like the Suwannee, it was still gorgeous enough to warrant a tune or two in its honor!

At first, we thought we were going to have difficulties obtaining a canoe like the clue had instructed. There was to be no pets allowed in the park. I attempted to explain to the people of the Outpost that we had left the Oligarchy's human pet in the car, but they kept stating that it was the five of us which were the problem. I was so annoyed that I almost hissed, but thank goodness the production crew intervened and explained the situation to the Outpost crew in a language they understood!

Traveling down the Santa Fe was an amazing experience. Though the five of us could not very well paddle, our guide more than made up for our lack of opposable thumbs. We saw beautiful trees of every variety: pine, cypress, and oak. We also saw several alligators and some very large birds. We had been told we might see a turtle or two, and so I kept a keen eye out for my friend, Shellie, but we had no luck.

When we arrived in Ginnie Springs, we searched for the clue in every spring and hollow tree. Homo sapiens that were milling about shot us weird glances and whispered about us (as if we could not hear their comments with our sharp sense of hearing!), but that did not deter us! We found the clue inside the Gift Shop, and so the five of us huddled together once more to read:

Make your way to Kanapaha Botantical Gardens.

"WOOHOO!" screamed Blackie. "We wanted to take you there, Zeus! How awesome that Phil read our minds!"

"More likely our postcard," snickered Alberta.

"I have been wanting to go too. The picture you sent me was amazing! I think it just looks spectacular!" I said.

We made our way to the parking lot for Ginnie Springs, and surprisingly enough, the Oligarchy's lady pet was waiting for us. She gave us all scritchins and checked our fur to make sure we had no fleas, flies, mites, or chiggers that hopped along for a free ride! Once more, she helped us into the car, and we made the drive back towards their house for they do not live far from the gardens.

When we arrived at Kanapaha Botantical Gardens, we all climbed out and made our way through the entrance. I hadn't known this, but the name, Kanapaha, is actually the name of the lake which the gardens surround. Kanapaha is a word which comes from the Timucua Indian words for "palmetto leaf" and "house". The reason that was the name of the lake is because long ago, Timucua Indians used to build thatched dwellings along the banks of the Lake Kanapaha. How very interesting it was to be so close to history!

We walked along lush pathways that were filled with some of the most beautiful flowers I had ever seen. The Crinum and Rose Gardens were simply spectacular! Most of the flowers in those two gardens were species that did well in the climate of Florida. We spent some time examining the Butterfly Garden as well which was filled with foliage that was meant to both be food for baby caterpillars and flowering for adult butterflies. (I immediately recognized this place as the picture which the Oligarchy had sent to me!)

We made our way past Lake Kanapaha and were led by our noses to the Herb Garden. There, in large brick beds, were some of the finest culinary herbs: basil, oregano, rosemary, and of course, catnip!

"Oh, do you smell it? I know you smell it," said Blackie to Charlie.

"Do you think we could just swipe some of it for ourselves? It's not like they will miss just a wee bit of it," asked Charlie.

"Are you two nuts?! We could get in serious trouble over that!" said Alberta.

"You know you want some nip." Sky looked at Alberta as if to say that he knew her real intentions. "You can't pretend to be good all the time!"

"Umm, well if the four of you want some for yourselves, I can just watch guard over here. I'll let you know if anyone is coming," I said.

"Wow, Zeus! You're the best!" said Blackie. The Oligarchy ripped bits and pieces of the catnip plants while I watched the nearby pathways for any sign we might be spotted. Soon, the four kitties were meowing and rolling about in the herbs! I turned around to find the four of them, eyes glazed, on their backs, admiring the sunlight.

"I think we need to get going. You can't poop out here in the Herb Garden," I said.

"But this is heavenly! I don't think I ever want to leave," said Charlie.

With a long sigh, Alberta said, "He's right, he's right, darn it, he's right! We need to go home, yes we do, we do, do, do!"

I tried not to giggle at my friends in their stupor, but it was sort of funny. We made our way back to the parking lot where the Oligarchy's human pet met us with a bizarre look. "The four of you snuck some catnip, didn't you?" she asked with some concern.

Blackie waved his paw at her as he said, "Nonsense, woman. I don't know what you're talking about."

"Mmm-hmm," said the human lady pet. "I think it's time we get the four of you home then just as soon as we drop off Zeus at the airport!"

I want to thank The Feline Oligarchy for inviting me to Gainesville, Florida! I had such a very special time with the four of you, and I really feel I got to face my fear of water head-on! I may actually think about letting my human pet give me a bath now. I would also like to give a special thanks to the Oligarchy's human lady pet for driving us to every place we visited. I hope you were not too terribly upset concerning the catnip!

Air Mail: Thought-Mail for Tiffy

Tiffy dearest, I hope you can hear me....

We were all so sad when we heard the news of your departure to take your new journey. My mama (yes, I do know what she is) cried and cried when she read the notice, and then she just stared at Isis and me for the longest time. She didn't say anything, and she didn't need to - we understood her just fine. It's sad when we have to leave suddenly without formal good-byes, and I knew immediately that we needed to send you one of our special thought-mails.

I hope you are greeted by many wonderful friends of ours who have gone on the same journey before you: Grandpa Norton, Silas, Edloe, Pebbles, Eppy, and so many more who we do not even know personally. I even sent a special thought-mail to Aditi, the Siamese who I came to know a few months ago. She and I were special friends, and she had such a kind heart. I told her to mother you a little when you arrived, but be forewarned: she's a bit talkative!

I will miss hearing of you and your grand adventures in Singapore. I will miss watching you grow up before my eyes. I will always see you in my mind as being an ever-playful, adorable, little kitty, and I am sure that you smile down even now upon those who took you and cared for you. I know you bear them no ill-will, but it will take them time to know that inside.

You know, little one, I won't say good-bye. I don't think I should. Good-bye would indicate that there was some sort of finality to it all, but that's simply not true. Instead, I will say, "Until we see one another again!" Yes, that seems more appropriate. For I will see you, my friend...just not now.

等耐心地我

Should you choose, send your consolations to 5-Cat Style and the Flyer.

Killer Catnip Anyone?

Hello once again, feline friends and human pets,

I awoke early this morning to find the human pet had laid a beautiful card by my head. At first, I thought it was from her, but then I sniffed the paper and realized it had been sent by other felines! Excited and curious, I opened it up to read:



Front:

Kanapaha Botantical Gardens

Inside:

May 30, 2006

Dear Zeus,

We just can't wait for you to come visit us in Gainesville, Florida! You can be head of the Oligarchy for the day and be in charge of the entire house and eat all the stinky goodness you want. Be sure to tell us your favorite. We are sending a photocard instead of a postcard because we could not find a postcard for Gainesville that did not have either an alligator or a sports' facility on it. While we will be happy to take you to some University of Florida facility, should you want to go, or find you an alligator to look at, we really want you to come visit us and see some natural Florida - other than alligators. We also want to take you to this Kanapaha Botantical Gardens place which is right down the road from our house. They grow some KILLER catnip in the herb garden which will make your trip all worth while.

Can't wait for you to get here!

Sincerely,
Alberta, Sky, Blackie, and Charlie

I bit my bottom lip for a moment upon reading this for I suddenly thought of all of the horrible things I had said about catnip users and homo sapiens with their selling of this illegal substance. I knew The Feline Oligarchy was a great group of friends, but how could I tell them that I didn't use catnip? Would they be ok with that? Would they ostracize me? Would I have to succumb to peer pressure nonetheless and dip my nose into it, lick it up, and then roll mindlessly in it?

Hopefully, they will take me as I am, even with my strict no-catnip stance.

The Amazing Zeus: Bangles, Bombay, and the Letter B in Singapore!

Hello feline friends and human pets!

When Phil came to pick me up this morning for my next journey, he arrived promptly at 5:00. I was already awake, but the human pet came stumbling out from her bedroom. She looked like she was frightened, and as she turned the corner and saw Phil standing in the foyer, she squinted her eyes at him and groaned.

"What's wrong with her?" asked Phil.

"I think she's delirious. You know she doesn't get up at this time usually," I answered.

As she rubbed the sleep from her eyes, the human pet said, "Tell me I am dreaming. Tell me Phil Keoghan is not in my foyer at five in the morning."

"Is it such a bad thing, Marina?" chuckled Phil.

"How would you feel if some strange person came into your house at five in the morning, Phil? I can call you 'Phil', yes? I mean, seeing as though you have been to this house now a number of times, I think we can move on to a first name basis." I was a bit stunned at the human pet's response to my friend, Phil, but he only chuckled more.

"Marina, why don't you go back to bed, and we can talk later sometime?"

Grumbling and muttering, the human pet turned and walked back down in the hall. We heard her bedroom door slam, and no sooner had the door been closed then the sounds of snoring came drifting into the living room. "Well, we need to get going, Zeus. Today is a very long trip. You're going to make several flight changes, and probably within twenty or so hours, you will be in Singapore."

Singapore?! Why that was halfway across the world! I was truly in for an adventure this time!

The flight to Singapore was truly the longest experience I have ever had. It reminded me of those times when the human pet and I lived in The Apartment. When she had to go out of town to Pittsburgh to see her family, she would take me to the V-E-T, not so I could get seen for medicine, but rather, to be boarded. She would leave me there in the super fancy condos with purebreed felines (and oh how they teased me for not being pure enough for their tastes!), and I would wait with baited breath for her return...cooped in this condo with no place to go! That was what the flight was like! For 25 hours, I was on an airplane with only two stops: one in Los Angeles, CA, and the other in Hong Kong. By the time I arrived in Singapore, I was kissing the sweet earth beneath my paws and thanking the Lord for keeping my tail in one piece!

As I walked through the airport, by ears were perked as I heard many different types of languages. It was completely fascinating! Yes, there was English being spoken, but I could also hear Mandarin, Malay, and Tamil. So many different tongues in one place was truly amazing in and of itself!

I stepped outside to see if I could find a taxi, but instead, a human lady with a big smile on her face walked up to me with a pretty wicker basket. She knelt down and scratched me behind the ears which immediately made me love her!

"Welcome to Singapore, Zeus! I'm The Letter B. I'm so glad you came to visit here!"

She opened the wicker basket, and I jumped inside. However, as she turned around, I managed to lift up the lid with my head in time to see Phil approaching us.

"Ooo, here he comes!" whispered TLB.

"The Letter B and Zeus. You will have $800.00 Singapore Dollars for this leg of the race. Here is your first clue. Read it carefully, and be safe on your travels."

Phil handed the clue to TLB. My eyes were still in awe of the $800.00 Singapore dollars we received! TLB explained to me, however, that that was equal to about $500.00 US dollars. Getting used to currency conversions is something I will need to work on!

We read the clue together:

Make your way to The Jurong Bird Park. Once there, search for your next clue.

My mouth started salivating as I imagined all of the tasty, feathered creatures that might lived in the park. I was truly hoping that perhaps the clue was stuck inside a bird, and I would have to get it out through the only way that Mother Nature intended for me to use: my bare paws! However, TLB told me that I could not harm the birds, and that I would need to be on my best behavior. I knew she was right.

When we entered the park, the Chilean Flamingos caught our eye to our right. I immediately began to become frightened. I had heard how Moose had cornered these scary and manipulative beasts, and how he had saved the lives of his human pets as the pink, pompous, pruners made their way stealthily along his front yard. TLB assured me that the flamingos (if that was their real name!) meant no harm to me, but I was not buying it. My hair stood on end, and I hissed vehemently to them to let them know that I too would not put up with their shenanigans!

We walked a little further up the path and noticed that the Macaw Courtyard was just past the Penguin Parade. I really wanted to see the parrots since I had heard from some reliable sources that they could talk. After having met a talking cow, I didn't think it so odd to try to meet a talking bird!

We entered into the exhibit, and I could not believe how colorful the birds were. Vibrant feathers of roaring red, yowling yellow, and gorgeous green filled my eyes! Of course, my ears were ripped apart from the constant screeching, but managed to fight through the pain. I was just trying to find one parrot who could hold an intelligent conversation with me, and if that meant obtaining a headache in the process, then so be it.

Parrots can live up to fifty years, but some of the ones living in the Jurong Bird Park are in danger of extinction. Apparently, homo sapiens are cutting down these parrots' environments, and with the loss of their homes, the birds are not able to meet one another easily to have families. At least at the Bird Park, the parrots are able to meet and socialize with one another, and they can see that they are not completely all alone!

We were just about to turn the corner to head off to the World of Darkness exhibit when I heard a peculiar voice:

"Zeus, wanna clue? AWCK!"

I turned my head in every direction and looked at TLB to see if she knew where the strange voice had come from. After a minute or two, we decided we were imagining it.

But then we heard it again: "Zeus, wanna clue? AWCK!"

"Where is that blasted sound coming from?" said TLB.

I turned my head to the left, and I saw the strangest sight. There, sitting on a small branch of a tree was a beautiful green parrot. He winked at me and shook his head. I noticed there was something in his mouth, and I tapped the outside of the wicker basket excitedly. TLB followed my eyes, and when she spotted the parrot, she said, "Oh my goodness! He has a tiny clue in his mouth!"
TLB reached out her hand, and the little green fellow dropped the clue onto her palm. We opened the tiny, itsy, bitsy clue together and squinted our eyes to read:

Make your way to the Singapore Botanical Gardens. Once there, make your way to the National Orchid Garden in the Central Core, and search for your next clue.

"Oh wow! Orchids are my human pet's favorite flower," I said to TLB. "I wonder if I will be able to pick a few to take home to her."

TLB laughed softly and said, "I think you will get your paws into big, big trouble if you were to pick any of the flowers, Zeus. It's best to keep your paws to yourself!"

The Singapore Botanical Gardens were simply amazing! There were so many beautiful paths to walk along to observe the beautiful flowers. It was obvious many people were needed to keep such a pristine place in its fabulous condition. We walked through Minden Gate along a path to our left which led us past the Marsh Garden Ponds. As we walked a bit more, we past Swan Lake which really had swans swimming
along the top of the water! We continued along, turning right and left where the path curved, past the Sundial Gardens and Floral Cloak and through the Ginger Garden, until we found the entrance to the National Orchid Garden.

I hadn't known this, but all of the orchids in the garden were actually 'made' by homo sapiens. Special gardeners made sure that only the best orchids were produced for the garden, and then they carefully arranged them to make sure the flowers made pretty presentations. There were over 1000 species of orchids, and then over 2000 'hybrids' (ones which were man-made) in the garden! Nestled in the stems and leaves of the fantastic orchids is where we found our next clue.

We opened the clue together and read:

Make your way to 5-Cat Style and the Flyer. Once there, meet with Bombay and Bangles and wait for further instructions.

"Oh wow! I am actually going to get to meet Bombay and Bangles?! That's so exciting!" I said.

TLB nodded. "I really have had such a terrific time with you, Zeus. I only wish that we could have done more things together."

I agreed. I headbutted TLB three or four times and placed my front paws on her left shoulder to nuzzle her ears. "You were a very good hostess, TLB! Thank you for joining me!"

TLB helped me get to the home of 5-Cat Style and the Flyer as I was still very, very (did I mention very?) unfamiliar with how to get around Singapore. We walked up together to the sisters' house and knocked on the door. 5-Cat Style opened the door (I recognized her from the blog!) and screamed!

"Flyer! Get over here! It's Zeus! He's here! Make sure to get Bombay and Bangles!"

She scooped me out of TLB's arms and snuggled me to her chest. I purred and purred! I had never really been met with such an affectionate greeting. Typically, only my human pet ever said hello to me like that! 5-Cat Style invited TLB inside and closed the door behind her. Flyer came into the room also and soon, all three human lady pets were watching us with smiles on their faces. 5-Cat Style placed me on the floor where I saw Bombay and Bangles staring at me with huge grins.

"So you met our Foster Mommy? She's terrific, yeah?" said Bombay.

I nodded and laughed. "She's very loving!"

Bombay and Bangles both chuckled. "Have you been having a fun time in Singapore? What have you done thus far?" asked Bangles.

I informed them of my trip to the Jurong Bird Park and my tour of the Singapore Botanical Gardens. Bangles was fascinated when I mentioned the talking green parrot with the clue in his mouth. Bombay wanted to hear more about the orchids and how they were presented in the garden.

Just then, there was a knock on the door, and the three of us laughed. "Ten dollars says it's Phil!" said Bangles.

"Fifteen dollars says its Phil!" said Bombay.

"I don't think you're supposed to raise his bet, Bombay," I said with a grin.

5-Cat Style opened the door and, as if we hadn't known, it was Phil!

"Bombay, Bangles, and Zeus. You will use the money given to you this morning when you were with The Letter B to continue on this leg. Here is your next clue. Make sure to read it carefully, and be safe on your travels."

We opened the clue and read it together:

Make your way to the Night Safari.

"Wow! The Night Safari! I have always wanted to go!" said Bombay.

"We're in for a really special time," said Bangles.

"Have you two been there before?" I asked.

"Nope, but we have heard a lot about it. They have lots of different animals there, and some of them are very endangered. I wonder what we will see!" said Bangles.

As if she was a mindreader, 5-Cat Style looked down at the three of us as we were discussing our plans and said, "Alright, you three, let's get going. I want to make sure you get to see everything there is to see!"

5-Cat Style helped the three of us catch service 171 to Mandai Road. We had to transfer to a different bus then, service 927, which took us directly to the Night Safari. The whole trip took roughly about an hour, but in that time, Bangles, Bombay, and I got to talk about Singapore in general and how it was different than America.

When we arrived, the whole place seemed very myterious, lush, and primal. Strange animal sounds filled the air, and our fur stood on end in excitement! We decided to do the Safari Adventurer Tour because we could ride in a "limo buggy" and have an experienced guide show us around the jungle.

We were able to see lots of different shows, exhibits, and trails. One that was especially fascinating was The Creatures of the Night show. We were actually able to be a part of the show which, mind you, was sort of frightening since many of those animals would love to have felines for lunch. However, the lead trainer, a man named Vinodh Ayathan, kept the owls, pumas, and other nocturnal animals just out of our reach. Vinodh seemed to have a very deep understanding for how animals thought and what they felt, and we were very impressed with his tremendous abilities!

I have never been in a jungle, let alone a jungle at night, and apparently, neither had Bombay or Bangles. However, our trepidation left us when we heard there was a Fishing Cat Trail we could observe.

"Fish and cats?! Super!" said Bombay.

"I wonder if we'll manage to get any fish," I said.

As we watched the trail, we saw different types of felines working on getting their food for the evening. They would walk along the edge of the water, carefully watching the swimming fish, and then pounce on them with such a fury that it made all three of us jump!

"I never have to work that hard to get food," stated Bangles.

"Neither do I. I only headbutt the human pet, and she gives me what I want," I said.

We kept asking the felines if they would share their catch, but none of them wanted anything to do with us. We just got a lot of growls and snaps of the jaw in reply. I suppose, however, that when you have razor-sharp canines and claws longer than my head, you can refuse to give me fish any time you want.

When the tour was over, we walked back to the front gate where 5-Cat Style and the Flyer were waiting for the three of us.

"Did you three have fun?" 5-Cat Style asked.

We all nodded and purred.

"Good! It's time, though, to say good-bye to Zeus, Bombay and Bangles. He has to go to the airport now to catch his very long flight home. I am sure his Foster Mommy misses him," she said.

"Human pet," I corrected her.

Everyone giggled at me, but I still don't know why.

"Thanks a lot for coming such a long way to visit with us, Zeus. I know I had a terrific time with you touring the jungle!" said Bombay.

"Indeed! I might have to try some of those fishing techniques that I observed in the human litter bowl!" said Bangles.

"Umm, there's no fish in there," said Bombay with a disgusted look.

"Oh well, maybe in a poi pond then. We'll have to find one though!" said Bangles happily.

I chuckled and gave my friends hugs. "I will miss the both of you, and I certainly hope that some day in the future, you come to Houston to visit!" I said.

I would like to thank The Letter B for inviting me to Singapore. I had such a very good time with you, and I hope that you will remember it for a long time to come! I would also like to thank 5-Cat Style, the Flyer, Bombay, and Bangles for inviting me to their lovely home. I truly enjoyed meeting all of you, and perhaps the next time, I can meet Gucci and Tiffy!

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