Monday, April 09, 2007

No shirt, no shoes, no thumbs - no problem

Opposable thumbs are overrated. - Zeus

Greetings, Zeus fans! My name is Radioactive Jam and-- well, I am not a cat, as far as I know. That's not my real name, of course. See, I wanted my very own dot-com internet domain, and was unavailable; I had to go with my second choice. But enough about me! We're here to celebrate the one-year anniversary of The Zeus Excuse.

The human "owner" said Zeus wanted me to compose an anniversary post for him. As readers here soon learn, Zeus can be pret-ty persuasive when he throws his weight around. Could I say no? I could not. So I hope you enjoy this special tribute post written for the one and only Zeus, the super-sized ego feline extraordinaire without whom this weblog would surely slim down need a new name be "diminished."

You don't need thumbs for typing. Spacebar? It is to laugh. - Zeus

Zeus claims he started a weblog to spread "advice, humor and joy" among feline friends. Sounds almost noble and altruistic, doesn't it? That's Zeus, all right; never thinking of himself, always putting the other cat first.

Dogs are obsessed with thumbs; cats couldn't care less. - Zeus

Cats have a reputation for holding themselves aloof, and Zeus is no exception to the rule. Zeus is cool, unfazed by events swirling around him. He has neither need nor time for trivial, shallow amusements; he's a Busy Cat with Important Things to do.

Do I look like I care? - Zeus

One of the things keeping Zeus busy this past year: extensive travel. Showing his signature modesty - not! - Zeus calls his travelogue The Amazing Zeus. It is pretty amazing, and not just because major world governments haven't yet realized how far his reach extends. They'll learn soon enough I am sure.

You don't need plans for world domination when you're already in control. - Zeus

Speaking of learning (and control), we humans should never underestimate a cat's ability to "manage" its environment. If one thinks a little thing like not having opposable thumbs will slow down a clever cat like Zeus, perhaps one needs to think again.

Doorknobs impede me? DOORKNOBS?! HAHAHAHAHahahaha! purrrrrr! - Zeus

Zeus portrays himself as an invincible, haughty overlord. Okay sure, that pretty much applies to all cats, and - let's face it - they're basically right. Still, one might find lovable "weaknesses" in the feline aura... if one knows where to look. Suppose I were to tell you that deep down, Zeus is just an old softie looking for a little affection and attention, not unlike a lot of human "owners?"

One word, humans: Photoshop! - Zeus

In closing I'll pass along a few words from an actor-friend of Zeus, pictured below in one of his many famous movie roles. Here's what he had to say about Zeus:

We're still trying to explain to Zeus why he shouldn't take "human" as an insult.


Carmen said...

I agree with captain kirk! And Zeus, you're one of the coolest cats I know! Pooh sends a shout out for your blogiversary, too!

Dachsies Rule said...

Happy Blogiversary! Today (April 9) is our one year of blogging. We must have felt your mighty cat vibes across Houston and the inspiration to blog come from you!

You are the coolest cat we know.

Roxie, Sammy & Andy

Cheysuli said...

Happy B;pgoversaru Zeus.

I completely understand your reasons for being insulted by that comment. I can only say, consider the source and it's the thought that counts. For he cavorts and understands aliens (or at least comes in peace and shoots to kill) he does not understand the superiority of cats.

Cheysuli said...

Oops. Maybe I should proof read. How about blogiversary?

Sparky Duck said...

happy happ day Zeus and Jam was a good choice!

Munchkin, Missy and Monte said...

Happy Blogversary.

The Meezers said...

Happy Blogaversary Zeus!! We loves your blog furry much - you is always one of the ferst ones we look at in the morning! Contaculations!!

Aloysius said...

Happy Blogiversary, Zeus! Everyone in our house enjoys your humor. And I say, humanity is overrated--let's hear it for felinity!

George, Tipper, Max & Misty said...

Zeus, everyone knows you can trust Cpt. James T. Kirk to speak the truth! Congratz on the 1st blogiversary of the Zeus Excuse.

yao-lin said...

Ha ha ha ha how funny. Very good tribute!

kailani said...

Happy One Year Blogiversary! My how you've grown!

Kukka-Maria said...

Happy Blogiversary, Love! The last year, with you, has been one of the most fulfilling of my entire life.

Well, other than that year I spent in Barbados with Brad Pitt...but you're a close second!

Parker said...

Zeus, you are too cool for school. You, my friend, are a big reason I commanded my Mommy to start a blog for me! Happy Anniversary!

Derby said...

Happy Blogoversary Zeus. Looking forward to another interesting year.

DivaP said...

Happy Blogiversary Zeus! -- from your human friends Diva P and Belle

Bone said...

Happy Bloggiversary, Zeus.

Very cute pics :)