Interviewer: Zeus, we noticed this book in your training bag. Any significance?
Zeus: Yes, Human Pet. I have been reading On Tai Chi Chuan in order to better harmonize my chi. I find that once my chi are in perfect balance, my workouts are much more effective. I also sleep better which is an added bonus.
Interviewer: Wow! That is one huge food bowl, Zeus!
Zeus: Yes. I have been attempting to pack on the pounds so I can better handle my opponents.
Interviewer: How many times do you eat like this?
Zeus: I eat about five to six times a day like this.
Interviewer: FIVE to SIX times A DAY?!?!
Zeus: Right now, I am a sleek 14 lbs, but in order to be truly competitive, I should be 22-25 lbs. It's going to take a lot of tuna, chicken, and sardines, Human Pet.
In other news, Isis still refuses to train for Tub Soccer. Will she or will she not decide to get in the rink this year? Will she get over her paranoia that the sponges are attacking her? This interviewer will keep you informed as to the latest developments in this ongoing story.