Thursday, December 07, 2006

Thursday Thirteen, Edition 17


Thirteen Human Behaviors During the Holidays That I Simply Do Not Understand

1. Having drank fifteen beers at the annual office holiday bash, you decide to tell your boss what you really think of him.

2. On Black Friday, you decide to get into a fight over a pair of cashmere gloves with a perfect stranger simply because she touched them. However, your proximity to the gloves meant you had actually claimed them.

3. You debate over whether or not you should purchase a gift for your mail carrier. You decide not to because it might get returned to sender.

4. It's acceptable not to pay bills during the holiday season because after all, no one is paying their bills during the holiday season. That's what the word holiday means.

5. No interest until 2007 sounds like an absolutely fabulous deal - until you realize that 2007 is in three weeks.

6. At a different office party, you decide to reveal your tank top...then your bra...then your naked chest to all. When asked why you did it later, you blame it on the spiked fruit punch.

7. You judge your worth based on the amount of Christmas cards you receive.

8. You debate over whether or not to buy an upside-down Christmas tree as it is the new trend for the season because it can hold more gifts underneath its branches thanks to the extra space.

9. Holiday lights on your home: A Christmas hit or Christmas blunder?

10. Procrastination! Buying your spouse that Ohhh so special gift at Walgreens on Christmas Eve. Don't forget to look in the bargain bin for that one dollar box of Easter Peeps as a stocking stuffer. Every kiss may begin with k, but every fight begins with f.

11. It's perfectly acceptable to pretend openly that you enjoy receiving that horrendous bag of one dollar stretchy and smelly plastic toys (and let's not forget the yellow goo that makes fart noises when you put your finger into it!) as a secret santa gift in front of the entire office.

12. The ideal gift for that "old fart" in your life: "Over the hill Champagne". Like that special someone, it has no fizz!

13. Saving money during the holiday season means breaking up with your boyfriend or girlfriend prior to December.



36 comments:

Tug said...

FUNNY. And some? true... I just ran a comic yesterday on my blog that deals with #1.....

Happy TT!

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I don't get a lot of those things, either. Especially the tree.

Well, to each his own, huh?

Happy TT!

ancsweetnsassygal said...

Ooh hate to admit it, but I've been guilty of #4 and #5 in the past...very funny list. My TT is up also.

Merry Christmas!

Cheryl said...

LOL at #13. Probably true in a lot of cases!

Anonymous said...

Your office party sounds fun.

Gattina said...

Lol, to most of it my cats agree with you. But the tip of the top is your Christmas tree ! Wonderful idea, but not so much for you, how can you hide under such a tree upside down ?

Anonymous said...

We humans are definetely strange creatures, huh? hehe

Anonymous said...

You just reminded my mom about that upside down Christmas tree trend! She and Dad were talking about that last year, and Dad thought the world had gone mad!

Bob-kat said...

Youa re very astute Zeus!

I must admit that I am guilty of No 7 at times but I do genuinely appreciate each and every card I receive as it means someone has taken the trouble to write and send it to me.

Anonymous said...

Did these situations at office parties really happen to your human pet, Zeus? ;)
Happy TT!

Carmen said...

an upside down tree! ha ha. I have enough trouble putting the regular one together.

Anonymous said...

LOL I love that upside-down Christmas tree, saw that a few weeks ago. Crazy people!

ali said...

seeing those upside-down trees still make me laugh my head off. hysterical!

Anonymous said...

Those are hilarious and I agree with you 100%!

Happy TT!

Mikala's 4th TT is up

Beau Beau & Angie said...

That goo you stick your finger in for an office gift would be more fun than all the other cheap a*s soap or cheap chocolate gifts I have to throw away or give to someone else every year. They're not even worth the effort to walk out the door with. Ugh. I better go listen to some Christmas music.
BB&A's Mom

.... meow >^^ said...

upside down tree - soooo 2005. What's in this year is the black tree baby!
http://www.christmastreeforme.com/black-christmas-tree-p-874.html
meow!

Sanni said...

I totally agree - especially on the upside-down tree!


Happy TT from Germany,
S.

Anonymous said...

Cute list!:)

Kukka-Maria said...

A top-heavy Christmas Tree. Brilliant!

Also, is it okay to show your muffins to the mail carrier? I don't have any office parties to attend.

Cheysuli said...

I had better not receive Walgreens gifts...

Caylynn said...

You know what Zeus? I'm human, and I don't get any of those things either. ::shrug:: Oh well.

Of course, I'm Canadian, so we don't have a Black Friday, since our Thanksgiving is on a Monday in October.

Thanks for the grins and happy T13. :)

Renee said...

I think the upside down tree looks a little funny, but it makes all the ornaments hang right. With a regular tree the other branches get in the way. I saw one at the Christmas store that was just pretty bent metal...I might have to get it!

Yeah, humans are weird

The Meezers said...

too funny Zeus. We doesn't unnerstand ANY human behavior, but this is just downright konfuzing.

Sparky Duck said...

Hmm do you know my BIL? #13 is his birthday savings plan as well.

Upside down tree??

Office parties are always great for gawking when your not the one getting gawked at.

Katherine said...

Hi, here from Sam's! That was a hysterical list. I especially liked the picture of the upside down xmas tree - that had better not catch on!

Colleen Gleason said...

Ummm...upside-down Christmas trees? Holy crap! What will humans think of next?

Eeek.

Pink Chihuahua Princess said...

I think we need to get the upside down tree. That way, that fat man can leave us more puppy treats, outfits, and beds under it. You know, dog beds have a really hard time fitting under the regular side up tree.

Anonymous said...

Yep, beans are weird!

Ariel said...

Very Funny.

Laughing Muse said...

I haven't seen the whole upside-down Christmas tree thing. Then again, I've killed English Ivy before, unintentionally. Any holiday tree I would buy would fall victim to my twin black thumbs.

DivaP said...

People who buy that upside-down tree are going to have serious credit card issues in 2007 because they are going to replace ornaments that keep getting broken from people who jiggle the tree when the visit to see how come it doesn't fall over. Or maybe it's just my friends who would do that ...

Jenny Ryan said...

Funny! Thanks :)

local girl said...

I have never seen an upside down tree before! LMAO! I can totally understand the idea behind it, though!

Hot(M)BC said...

Um, I don't fink I wanna break up wif my boyfriendcat efun if it is Chrissymouse!

Anonymous said...

I liked your list!
Especially the one bout the tree. But I prefer definitely the traditional one...

Hugs and Greetings from Germany,
Sonny

http://sweetlikekitty.blogspot.com

K T Cat said...

Why is it called Black Friday if everyone is out having fun shopping and spending money?