Saturday, July 03, 2010

The Last M. Night Shyamalan Movie I Will Ever Pay Money To See

[Image from claudia|gina|jung]


Dear readers,

If at any point in your lives you thought M. Night Shyamalan was a good writer, director, or producer, I am here to inform you that you must let that delusion go. His latest work, The Last Airbender, couldn't have been more disastrous unless some Earth Bender had taken a great poo in a litter box, 'bent' the poo, and sent it flying at some Fire Bender for an attack.

Hell, I might have been more interested had that happened.

With characters stating what they're doing as they're doing it or reminding us of information we already know, Shyamalan has effectively held up his "You're an idiot" sign to the audience for all to see. I actually counted how many times Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation told the audience, "I cannot go home without [The Avatar]." Literally, I lost count at 12.

As if that wasn't bad enough, the casting is horrific. Explain to me how a Caucasian family came to live in the Southern Water Tribe with Inuit people. Better yet, explain to me how they get to be the heroes in this melodrama while all of the Asian-Americans in this film are cast as villains. When asked to explain his casting, Shyamalan stated he wanted something "multicultural". Well, there's wanting diversity and actually STICKING TO THE ORIGINAL STORYLINE WHICH WORKED WITH ASIAN AND NATIVE-AMERICAN CHARACTERS AS HEROES!

I'm begging, homo sapiens. Don't see this film. You will never get those two hours back. Instead, use them this weekend to take a nap. It's a much better investment of your time.

ZEUS

7 comments:

Mishkat said...

Ha ha ha - great review! We rarely go to see movies in the theatre but had heard that this was really bad unless you just want to study the special effects.

I liked The Sixth Sense but have only seen one of his other movies (Unbreakable) and did not like it very much.

Zeus said...

I liked Signs and The Sixth Sense. I enjoyed Lady in the Water when others hated it. I tolerated The Village and Unbreakable, but this is really where I draw the line! :)

Jan's Funny Farm said...

Don't worry, we won't go see it. We can think of more fun things to waste our money on. :)

Simba said...

Thanks for the heads up. We will sit on the deck and drink Iced tea instead.

Noll's Nip said...

The review in our local newspaper wasn't very flattering either. So that makes two thumbs down!

Angel and Kirby said...

Since it is based on a cartoon and the cartoon characters tell what they are doing, that could have been the reasoning. I am setting with a house full of kids that say ti is suppose to be good.

Zeus said...

I'd be interested to hear what the little ones have to say about the film. I'd be very shocked, though, if they think it's a good film.