I am writing to inform you that I do not appreciate you renaming monsters to Zeus on your little game of Evercrack. I also do not think it's appropriate to make fun of my claws, my fur, or my tail. I do not appreciate being referred to as a "scumbucket" or a "nasty cat". I also do not like being called any handful of expletives that are in your limited vocabulary.
If you were to try to deny that you have done any of these things, I offer up to you exhibit A:
While I understand that you are a good friend of my human pet, it does not give you the liberty to make fun of me. After all, I own her, and she answers to me. If you do not cease in your profane and debase actions against me, I will be forced to shred the DSL cable and knock out the modem. Don't make me get ugly. You will not like it.