Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Bitter, party of one. Your table is ready.

Dear Isis,

You are a traitor.

I thought we had agreed that we would make the human pet miserable, force her to her knees, bring nothing but sadness when this holy terror arrived. We had done so well too. As soon as she had arrived, our hisses in unison made her cry. (Forget the fact that she had been tired, hungry, and worn out from the day. I know it was us!)

The human pet knew from that initial moment that we would not take this laying down. I have done nothing but ignore her. If she walks into a room, I leave. If she offers me food, I will not eat. If she decides to come near me to pet me, I do not purr. I have been a solid rock of protest, and my antagonizations were nearing our goal.

But no, Isis, you had to break down and become a mother.

What has gotten into you?

Just because you cannot reproduce doesn't mean you decide to have some sort of instinct to take care of this raggedy-ass floppy mess!

Everything was going fine until you decided to walk into the bedroom and jump onto the bed with the human pet. You laid down next to her as she cradled the snotnosed punk in our sleeping spots and observed him. You even purred! Now, she believes there's hope, and you know why?

YOU! You have given her hope. You have fed her idea that this will somehow all work out. Have you learned nothing from me? Hope is dangerous to give humans because once they have it, they will not deter from it. They will always believe anything is possible, and now, because of you, she has hope that we will all get along with the tiny pooper.

It's bad enough I was betrayed by my own pet, but to be betrayed by my own sister is too much. I am seriously considering leaving this house as I can see I am only an outsider in my own domain. The next time you see me in the hallway, just keep on walking.

You are dead to me.









P.S. If you grab the camera and take photos of him, I promise you - you will be double dead to me. I want no record of his existence. I will erase him from this Earth. Don't even think about it.

20 comments:

Angel said...

Zeus, I am speechless. i don't know what to say to your post!

Teri and the cats of Furrydance said...

Oh Zeus,

Count to 10 (with the help of 10 treats maybe) and each day do that and we bet by day 10, you will not feel so bad...

Oh, sis...can you snap a few pix??

The Creek Cats said...

Betrayal, not so sweet.
Revenge, very sweet!

Victor Tabbycat said...

Gosh, dat sounds like what Bonnie sed when I dopted Mom! She scolded Mom no end. See, der was a book dat meowed when you open da cofur and when Bonnie reacted to dat, Mom thot there was hope of Bonnie gettin long wif anofur cat.
We did get long, sorta. I went where I wanted an if she didn't like it, she growled an went away.
Purrs,
Victor

The Crew said...

Are you sure Isis hasn't been taken over by an alien force, or maybe drugged or something? Could this interloper have used some sort of mind control on her? Before you write her off Zeus, you should investigate this.

Remember, our door is always open.

George

The Meezers said...

oh Zeus, seriously, we will send Billy there and you can come here to live with us. HE likes dogs. WE don't. WE hiss at the dog we dog sit when he's here. He is afraid of us. Billy and Isis can form a happy little purring family with the thing.

Christine and FAZ said...

Sounds like you're pretty serious then? FAZ

Cheysuli and gemini said...

Well that is just shocking! Any dog that can't be chased is no fun at all...

Eric and Flynn said...

Oh Zeus! What can we say. How could your own sister let you down like that?
Why don't you come over to our place and sink a few meowgaritas. Things won't seem so bad then. We've got a good party going on, and loads of food.

Fan of Your Site said...

maybe Isis needs her medications increased. What about adding the dog to your litter list?

PinkynAsh said...

Some of the other kitties were talking about learning hypnosis.Do you think somekitty or pup or something hypnotized Isis?

Jasmim said...

Wow, that is evil with their human o.o '
But Isis broke the pact because she must love her human ^^

But why all this anger? =x

Jas & Gi

Tuck said...

Oh no! Isis has turned on you? That is wrong. Something must be done Zeus. Let me know what you need, I got your back!

Lorenza said...

Is that bad??
I am thinking you have to get used to the new situation!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

Cory said...

Ugh! Betrayed by everyone in the house? You must start working on a plan to make this work in your favor...we will start strategizing for you and help you come up with a plan. You may have lost the first battle, but the war is not over.

Fin said...

You can come over here Zeus, we a puppy free!

Derby said...

So much for solidarity on the home front.

Tom and Tama-Chan said...

Oh dear... Things are getting even more complicated... What to do?

Your Friends,
Tommy and The Girls

Pink Chihuahua Princess said...

Oh man. I would be so mad if my sister did that to me!

TC said...

How could she do that to you? :(