Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Keeping the world safe from defects one bra at a time

It's tough work being a ladies' undergarment inspector. I take my job very seriously. When my pet throws her undergarments into the specialized, heavy-duty receptacle, I immediately spring into action.

There have been times when my pet hasn't exactly been too keen on my position as a ladies' undergarment inspector. Consider the time when I pawed at a new, black, lace bra she had just recently purchased. The item was not too durable, and I ended up having it caught on my claws, dragging it back and forth with me throughout the house.

You would think she would have thanked me for exposing such poor craftsmanship!

Instead, she said, "I can't believe you, Zeus!"

She tried to steal it from me, but I couldn't let her have it because I hadn't completed my inspection. I rolled onto my back, used all four of my paws, and attempted to rip it back into my clutches. She told me we weren't playing, and I agreed, but still, she continued to her folly.

That bra hit the trash moments later: holes, tears, and all.

Clearly, it wasn't suitable for everyday wear.

Recently, in tribute of my hard work and dedication, Budlight released a commercial in my honor. I'd like to share that with you now, if I may:




Nevermind the fact that I'm not in it or that the girl is clearly not my pet. Let's not also mention how she has a drawn-on moustache and goatee. I should probably not even get into the fact that she's posing as a man looking at ladies' underwear.

Hmm...

Ok, so maybe it's not that terrific of a commericial.

Nonetheless, I'm truly touched. Thank you, Budlight, for recognizing me in such a way. I will not let you down.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

HAHAHAHA, what a grate job yoo are doing! Just as Mr. lite says "today we soolute yoo"...this is an amazing talent yoo have Zeus!

Carmen said...

Pooh Bear once "captured" my mom's bra, and carried it around like he'd caught a bird or something, growling at anyone who tried to take it from him.

Perhaps your underwear inspection prowess is why I saw this headline on yahoo this morning

Modern pagans honor Zeus in Athens

Zeus said...

That's right, Carmen. Pagan or Christian; Judaism or Muslim: All must wear underwear.

Anonymous said...

yep, i cant even top Carmen, not gonna try

Anonymous said...

you is doing a grate service to teh womens. I also inspekt my mommy's bras and put them frough the "Teef of Sammy" test - I has chewed frough quite a few bra straps in the last 2 years. - Sammy

Anonymous said...

See...now I always pictured your Human Pet with a beard and a bra. Hmmmmmmm...

Renee said...

That was weird that it was a woman inspecting women's underwear...while the voiceover was talking about inspecting men's undies. too weird.

I don't have an undie inspector here...my last one used to eat them. OOPS! I forgot my kittie who liked to play with my pantyhose while I was putting them on...luckily he was declawed or I would have been in a real mess! I don't believe in removing kitty claws...his previous owner did that to him. Poor guy.

Anonymous said...

We has a sock inspector...only one time has she (Gracie) tried to inspect Momma's undergarments...but she steals Momma's socks all the time.

Abby

Pixie (Daisy's sister) said...

It's a tough job, but someone's got to do it!

Anonymous said...

Those bra things have always perplexed me. I mean...they are pretty much cat toys so why does the Woman insist on wearing it? Most of my toys are covered in nip so I must assume she gets attacked as she leaves the house therefore I must inspect as well.

Chase

Anonymous said...

I do a little inspecting myself...but not as much as you do.

KXBC said...

Don't get yourself choked on the straps. Those are the work hazards of a bra inspector.

Jess said...

You're my American hero.

Karen Jo said...

It's so good of you to protect your Mom from defective merchandise like that. She probably doesn't feel the same way about it, though.

Cheysuli said...

Zeus, that's such an important public service you perform. In fact, I'd feel safer if I wore bras, but as an thin athletic cat, I have no need...

sage said...

I'm sure it's blasphemy for me to even think of mentioning this to your human pet, but there is the option of de-clawing animals (even god-like ones) who have a habit of ruining underwear.

sage said...

Zeuw, I'm sure it is blasphemy for me to even think of this, but I could mention to your human pet the option of declawing, which exist even for a god-like animal, that has problems ruining the "less is more" underwear of humans.

Anonymous said...

I think I know that guy in the commercial.