There is no petting my tail
unless you wish to have me sail
over the couch and under the table
since you know I'm not that stable.
There is no petting the top of my head
because there's better places instead,
and when you put your hand there
you need to know that's a triple dog dare.
There is no petting my ears!
You know I have irrational fears!
But if you insist, then so will I,
and my claws will make you cry.
There is no petting my tummy
even if you think we're chummy!
I'll grab your hand, and then you'll understand
when I leave my bloody brand!
There is only one place
and it is near my face
that I ever wish to have pet.
If you're not my Mama,
then please: No drama!
Keep your hands AWAY!